Kat Millar

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5 Stages of Mindset Change

 

We are collectively walking together through a crisis period, one that is filled with great uncertainty for many of us.

We are in a time of loss. We still have so much to be grateful for, yet we have also lost a lot.

And I believe important to acknowledge that and grieve the loss in a healthy way.

I think it’s wise to acknowledge and feel our feelings, whatever they are.

None of us have ever been through this. And many of us are struggling to adapt to the changes that have happened so fast.

Stress happens when our bodies feel fear and we don’t process our thoughts and feelings in a healthy way.

We can’t function and perform well for ourselves, our clients, our communities or our businesses if we live in a constant state of stress.

We can’t pour from an empty cup.

So the first step is becoming aware of what’s happening internally.

How we walk out this crisis is determined by the mindset we choose as we navigate through it.

I’ve recently noticed a cycle in my own thinking through this time, and also in the thinking of some of my clients and friends.

I have named this cycle the 5 stages of mindset change.

In this video and article I share the 5 stages in the cycle and how they manifest in your life, so you can determine how to move to the next stage and use this time to become more resilient.

Stage 1 – React

The first mindset change is to react. We are all reacting very differently to the circumstances around us.

There’s one thing we can’t control and that’s the circumstances around us.

The circumstance is neutral until we put thought and meaning to it. A circumstance cannot make us feel anything.

There are plenty of things we can control, like our thoughts, our emotions, our actions, and our results.

This isn’t anything new, this is well-known in the world of psychology.

This is the way our brain works and what happens when we realise that our reaction to a circumstance is within our control.

We might not control our initial impulse to react, but we can control the meaning we give to the circumstance.

We can control our thoughts about the circumstance, which then controls our feelings about it. Our actions and behaviours follow on from there.

Realising there is so much we can control is very helpful when we feel out of control with a lot of uncertainty in our lives.

We all react differently. Some people are in different stages.  If you think about the stages of grief, there is shock, then there’s numbness. I’ve definitely had some numbness where I’ve found I’m not remembering things and my brain is foggy.

Some of us do what I call going to ‘BED’.

B is for blame

E is for excuses

D is for denial.

We might rotate between blaming other people and blaming ourselves for how we feel. We make excuses. We can start saying that we are not going to achieve our goals or we are not going to move forward.

We can deny our feelings and the changes and almost ‘pretend it’s not happening. In this stage we are reacting to what’s happening rather than taking control of our responses. It’s like we want to just hang out until it’s all over.

Stress occurs in a number of ways and can show up in physical, mental, emotional and behavioural red flags.  We might feel irritable, moody and unmotivated. We might find ourselves over-consuming and indulging in bad habits. These are all symptoms of stress and occur in the ‘react’ stage.

Stage 2 – Reflect

In this stage, we start to reflect on how we’ve chosen to react. Some people never make it to the reflecting stage.

Have we chosen to retreat or advance, to become stronger and grow, or have we hidden from facing the reality of the crisis?

To reflect is healthy. Be open with yourself about how you are feeling and how you have been handling the situation.

Reflection allows us to GROW from this situation.

We can choose a growth mindset that takes what’s thrown at us and we can use it to become stronger, more powerful and more evolved.

We can live at the ’cause’ side of the equation.

Or we can live at the ‘effect’ side.

We all have a choice. We can choose to retreat or advance, choose to become stronger or diminish during this time. This all starts with reflection. 

Stage 3 – Recover

The next stage that a lot of people move to, is what I call recover.

In the recovery stage, we’ve reflected on how we’ve reacted, and then we start to recover.

We start to become more self-aware, self-accepting and accepting of the situation.

We may have been frustrated or angry at having things taken from us.

For example for me, I was so frustrated that I couldn’t use the gym! Going to the gym has been part of my life for 25 years and it was wired into my habits and lifestyle and even identity. It was a coping mechanism.

I would go from feeling frustration at not being able to go to the gym, to feeling guilt and beat myself up for being silly that it’s such a ‘first world problem’. Then I went to feeling compassion for myself for the loss. Even if it seems small and insignificant to someone else.

I’ve realised that I had to grieve the loss of that part of my life. That it’s ok.

Have you lost things that form part of your identity and are also a coping mechanism? If that’s you, I understand.

There is a sense of loss and grieving that comes with any type of loss of something or someone we’re used to.

When you start to recover, you look at the possibilities.

You ask yourself things like “How do I want to be in this season? What can I do differently? How can I meet my needs in a different way, now that restrictions are in place?”

Stage 4 – Reset

The reset stage is a stage where you need to have empathy for yourself and for others.

This is the stage to show yourself kindness, grace and compassion for what you’ve been going through.

This is where the rebooting and recharging kicks in and your creativity gets turned back on.

Recently, I’ve been wanting to plant some things on my balcony. I want to do some painting and I want to write more poetry.

I want to sort out my online systems and I feel more motivated to make changes, whereas in the first few weeks of this, I was feeling numb, confused, lost and a bit all over the place.

In the reset phase, we make empowering changes.

For example I’ve committed to a friend to meet in the park and motivate each other, go for bike rides and take the weights out.

I’ve committed to some non-negotiables of daily sunshine, nature and movement.

I’ve committed to showing up online, regardless of how I feel. I’ve committed to being productive.

The reset stage is putting in some routines, making sure that you have a schedule and keeping some sense of certainty.

Your brain is freaking out right now because there are so many unanswered questions. We don’t know how long this is going to last. There is so much uncertainty.

Having routine brings certainty to your brain. I need a sense of routine every day. I need to stop staying up late. I need to go to bed earlier and get up with a plan every day. I need to stick to my daily plan and weekly goals.

If you’ve fallen down and gotten off of the track, forgive yourself, pick yourself back up again and start showing up in a way that inspires you.

Stage 5 – Resilience


Resilience is your ability to bounce back from stress.

This is where we shift from the stress response to being strong.

Resilience is about acknowledging your feelings of stress and being kin

d to yourself and deciding to use them to grow.

When we are in the resilient stage, we feel strong, resourceful, creative and powerful.

But then something might happen and we find ourselves back in stage 1 as we react again and go back around the cycle again.

We’ve all been feeling certain levels of stress. It’s important to acknowledge that it is stress and that your brain doesn’t feel safe due to the upheaval we have all been experiencing.

When you feel stress rising up in your body, take a moment to do some stress relief actions:

* Deep breathing or meditation.

* Increase your movement and intake of healthy food.

* Externalising your thoughts – journaling, or processing with a coach or friend.

* If you have nervous energy and find yourself scrolling, find something to create something and do things with your hands.

Remember that comforting yourself is different to caring for yourself.

Most of all – be kind to you. You’re doing great, my friend. Even if you don’t think you are.

I know we all try to be strong and independent, powerful leaders, but we’re all going through this together. It helps us if we are open, honest and vulnerable.

When we face these feelings, it allows us to move on to the resilience stage more quickly.

You don’t need to rush to resilience. The by-product of reflecting, recovering and resetting will be resilience.

Love to hear your thoughts.

Are you a service-based business owner?

Do you need help setting up an online funnel, so you can attract new clients?

I’m offer a free 30-minute strategy session here

*First-time sessions

I’ll help you clarity your next steps to building your own, profit-producing marketing funnel, fast.

Looking forward to helping you get more clients online!

Take care and stay strong,

Kat

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Crush It In Crisis

You might be thinking “Crush it in crisis? I’m still dealing with the uncertainty, let alone crushing it!”

I hear ya. So let me define what I mean by crush it.

Firstly, what ‘crushing it’ is NOT:

* Being insensitive about people’s current situation

* Profiteering from people’s struggles

* Focusing on your goals at all costs

What ‘crushing it’ IS:

* Thinking like a successful business owner and being brave as a leader in these uncertain times

* Making necessary pivots in your business methods, delivery, packaging and messaging

* Crushing your fears so you can grow in this challenging season (IF you want to!)

Journeying through a crisis time, especially one that’s completely new can create a range reactions.

Some of you want to stay in bed, pull a blanket over our heads and try to avoid what’s going on.

Many people have told me they are wondering at the moment…

“Should I be retreating back or pausing my business goals until all of this is over?”

This is fair to consider, since there is so much uncertainty at the moment.

Let’s acknowledge the fact that the way we need to do business now in this current economic climate is different.

Things have changed and for most of us, our business needs to change as well.

But if you want to crush it, I encourage you to step up, pivot your business where you need to – and jump into all the opportunities that are available you.

I believe that the world NEEDS us as authentic, heart-centred business owners to continue to operate our businesses…

…IF our products and services genuinely provide a REAL solution to a REAL problem.

The only way to do this is to keep offering our help to people who want and need what we offer.

Many people still WANT to buy what you’re offering.

People are not going out and spending money on entertainment, dining out, travel etc. And they’re at home online.

Many people still need your help. And people often don’t value what they don’t invest in.

People pay for what they truly want and need.

Despite the uncertain times we are living in, we can be absolutely certain about ONE thing at the moment…

…ONLINE is THE way.

We have NO choice BUT to be effective online if we want to survive in business.

Here are 5 skills you need to utilise in this time to make consistent money online:

Number 1: The Skill of Providing Value

Providing value is the Number 1 skill you need to have in business.

Value is not necessarily monetary value. It is not always about money changing hands, but it’s still an exchange.

It’s the value you are giving to those who invest in you, whether that is someone paying for your time or if it’s someone opt-in to an email.

What is it costing your ideal clients in their time, money, energy and attention? Are you giving value by being helpful and relevant?

Are you speaking directly to your ideal client, not just to the masses? Are you speaking to the people who you can really help with your level of mastery?

If you can show up and be genuine and give quality information, then you’re adding value. Remember quality, not quantity.  This includes your free offers, and also your paid clients and those who are a part of your paid community.

Number 2: The Skill of Copywriting

The Number 2 skill you need at this time to make consistent money is the skill of copywriting and now is a really good time to learn this skill.

Copywriting is a very underrated skill and it affects your ability to influence people positively through your writing online.

All your Facebook ads, your blogs and captions need to be influencing, engaging and providing value. These are what help people take the next step towards you.

A good investment in the next 30 days is to consume copywriting education and focus on increasing your copywriting skills.

Number 3: The Skill of Presenting

The third skill you need is the ability to present. This could be presenting an offer to a one-on-one client on a phone call. It could be presenting on video, which is what we all need to be doing at the moment in this socially distanced world we are currently living in.

How good are you at your presentation skills and your ability to craft words, videos and webinars?

Number 4: The Skill of Marketing

The Number 4 skill we need to boost our business presence online is marketing. Marketing is your ability to attract clients through social media, blogs, emails and other platforms and channels.

At the moment we don’t have a lot of offline options, so online is where we need to shine.

Number 5: The Skill of Sales

Sales is your ability to get money into your bank account and to get people to pay you.

It doesn’t matter how amazing you are at providing value, at marketing and doing pretty posts or creating amazing pieces of content. If you can’t get someone to actually part with their money, then your business is going to fail.

Think about the above skills and give yourself a score from zero (meaning you’re really bad at these skills) or a 10 -which means you know you can’t get any better.

5 Actions You Can Take To Crush it in Business

Number 1: Cut Back on News and Social Media

I recommend you cut back on the news and social media that you are consuming.

Please stay informed, be healthy and know what’s going on and don’t put your head in the sand.

But check-in with yourself and be honest with yourself with how much time are you spending consuming media.

We need to be bringing inspiring, helpful and positive messages to our eyes and ears during this period.

If you’re digesting things that cause you to worry, drop your confidence or cause your mood to drop, then that’s a sign that you need to cut back and protect yourself.

Your confidence and emotional wellbeing is so important in business. It will make you or break you.

Number 2: Create Daily

Spend your time and energy on daily creation. Just show up and write, show up and practice your videos everyday.

When we create and produce during this crisis, we will crush it, because we’ll feel good about ourselves. We will feel purposeful as humans because we were designed to create.

Focus on quality, not quantity. It doesn’t mean going live on Facebook every day. It doesn’t mean writing a blog post every day either. It just means writing or speaking every day and focussing on improving your skills.

I recommend that you focus on video during this crisis season, because people are craving connection even though it’s through a screen.

Number 3:  Get your Marketing Funnels Live

The Number 3 way to crush it in this crisis is to get your marketing funnels going live as soon as possible, even if they’re not perfect.

You might need to create a freebie like a downloadable guide or a cheat sheet.

Focus on making it relevant, helpful and VALUABLE – and get it up there and start building your email database.

This is one of the best ways for you to leverage your time and help more people.

Start running online events for people if you haven’t been doing that already. You know enough about your topic to help people right now.

Number 4:  Focus on Getting ONE Thing Finished

I’ve talked to quite a few people this week who have started a lot of things and not finished them.

We need to develop blinkers and get the thing we started completed before we move on to the next challenge.

People don’t pay for a half built bridge. They pay for a FULLY built bridge.

Please don’t be tempted to start a book and then move on to starting a podcast, and then move on to a five-day challenge then a webinar. Finish one thing.

Focus and finish!

Number 5:  Choose ONE skill to develop

Developing your online skills is one of the most valuable things you can do at the moment.

I recommend that for the next 30 days, focus on ONE of the 5 skills.

Or maybe you want to dive deep on one of the skills for 7 days. Consume all the books, articles and podcasts on that one skill.

Pick the skill that is your weakest link or the skill that’s most holding you back.

Remember, if your service is helping someone improve their life, then there’s no reason why you shouldn’t show up and offer it. And in fact, if you don’t, you can’t help anyone.

You’re improving people’s lives and it’s a value exchange, so do not feel guilty about offering what you offer – IF it’s ethical, authentic and genuinely helps people get a real result.

Remember, we don’t have a lot of certainty about a lot of things at the moment, but we do have certainty that business is now ONLINE.

If you haven’t got marketing funnels in place, then that is one of the most important things that I strongly recommend you focus on during this time, is creating a funnel.

Having a good marketing funnel gives you an ability to capture people and continue to nurture them and provide value and help them.

Due to the amount of people online during this time, we need  to make sure that we stand out.

We also need to make sure that we get people away from our social media pages and onto our email lists. This gives us control of sending marketing material, nurturing and providing great value to people.

A marketing funnel is a series of steps that takes someone from being a stranger into a client. A marketing funnel is the number 1 asset you need to make money online.

If social media suddenly crashed and you didn’t have access to your friends and followers, how are you going to market yourself?

Your email database is one of THE most important assets in your business.

A funnel will help bring people into your email list and from there you can continue to market to them for weeks, months even years to come.

Building a marketing funnel and getting it live is one of the essentials for your business to survive and thrive in this crisis.

Want help creating your own funnel to attract more clients?

‪You can book a free 30-minute strategy session here

*First-time sessions

I’ll help you clarity your next steps to building your own, profit-producing marketing funnel, fast.

Looking forward to helping you get more clients online!

Kat

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The #1 Tool You Need To Attract Clients Online

Hey friends,

In this video and article, I share 3 opportunity blockers that may be hindering your business growth.

I also share 3 super-slow ways to get clients online (what NOT to do),

and 3 super-charged ways to attract clients online.

Do you want to be one of those people whose business takes off and soars during this season?

Or will you be the one who retreats and gives up?

We are living in very unusual times. If you want to not only survive in these challenging days, but thrive, I invite you to be open to the new opportunities around you to grow your business online.

I’m sure you’re here because you want to be one of those people is successful in this period, and really help people and make a difference in this time.

3 Opportunity Blockers

Opportunity blockers are limiting beliefs that we tell ourselves, that block us from progressing. I want to dispel some of the main limiting beliefs that are coming up in people right now.

What I love about times that we’re in like this, is that all our belief systems come to the surface, and if forces us to deal with them.

Number 1 opportunity blocker I’m hearing from people in these changing times, is:

I don’t know enough / I’m not expert enough

that they don’t know enough and they are not experts.  I want you to really challenge your beliefs.

Because of fear of not feeling good enough or not knowing enough, you are missing opportunities. You need to make a decision and say, ‘I’m going to be willing to show up, no matter how I feel.’  Say to yourself, ‘I’m capable. I can handle it and people need help during this time.’

Number 2 opportunity blocker is the belief that:

The market is already too saturated

If you’re a relationship coach, because of web search algorithms, it appears there are relationship coaches everywhere.

The truth is there are more people who need help than there are people who can help them.

So that’s one myth I want to bust!

Number 3 opportunity blocker is the belief that:

No-one is spending money at the moment

…or it’s unethical to sell during this time, or people don’t want to buy at the moment…

How many of you feel that it’s not a good time to ask people for money?

The truth is there are MANY people out there who need your help and encouragement during this season.

You’ve got a tribe of people that you have a specific skill-set, that you can help right now. If you don’t help them, potentially, they will struggle… and so will you!

You are not selling a gimmick, you are genuinely interested in helping people and you have something of value to serve people with. You cannot let the fear of judgement stop you from progressing in your business.

If you stop selling, your business could go under – then you can’t help anybody!

So please keep giving people an opportunity to receive value and help.

3 Super-slow Ways to Get Clients Online – What Not to Do

Here are three super-slow ways to grow your business:

Number 1: Relying on just social media posts to grow your business

Many people have been telling me they’ve been posting and no one is interested. They take it personally, instead of looking at their systems.

It might be that only one area needs tweaking, like their marketing and copywriting. It may be that they are not communicating their value well. The most common thing I see is poor marketing skills. Organic posts are a very slow way to build your business.

Number 2: Relying too much on word of mouth and referrals to get clients

That is like handing your business control over to someone else. If you’re one of those lucky businesses that constantly gets an influx of leads and referrals by word of mouth, then you’re quite rare.

There will come a day that you will need to be more proactive in your marketing, and you cannot just rely on other people to do your marketing for you. Relying on word of mouth is a very slow way to grow your business.

The most important thing is to take control of your marketing. Take the reins and ensure you’ve got online and offline strategies for lead generation.

Also hone your skills in sales, marketing, copywriting and presenting through this downtime. These are timeless skills that can help you future-proof your income.

Number 3: Just sending people to your website

When people aren’t getting the click-throughs to their websites, they think it’s something wrong with them, but it’s actually usually just a traffic problem.

If you’re not getting clients, check that you are giving really great value through all of your content, whether it’s free or paid. But more than likely, you are giving value but people aren’t finding it.

We don’t just want to send people to our website but to landing pages where people can opt-in and you can build your email list and continue to provide value to people and nurture them.

Also, landing pages convert 4-10x higher than a page on your website.

So don’t just rely on your website, which is a super-slow way.

3 Super-charged Ways To Get Clients Online

These are what I call my three secret online marketing weapons.

Number 1: Post regular, educational content targeted to your ideal client

Rather than just posting random things, you want to think about what your ideal client needs to know.

How can you help them actually get a very small result through your content?  Make sure it’s consistent and original, not just reposting other people’s opinions.

Have a voice and post on social media at least three times a week. Once a week post a really good piece of content such as a video blog and ensure it’s directed to your ideal client.

Number 2: Run webinars

Webinars are one of my favourite ways to get clients. Here’s why:

1. They can help you grow your list & get new clients fast

2. You can help more people at once

3. It’s a fast way to get & hold attention

4. There is longer exposure to you, helping people make a significant buying decision

5. Compared to written content or social media, you can more effectively educate, inform, & nurture people

6. They opens new doors of opportunity

7. It’s a great skill to learn that you have for life

Webinars can build your email list and also reach people globally.

They are a very leveraged method to use to grow your business. They are a profitable, scalable asset.

 

Number 3: Create a marketing funnel

This is actually the number 1 tool you need to attract new clients online. A marketing funnel is a series of steps that you put together, to take your ideal clients from being strangers to paid clients.

These could be prospective clients that meet you on social media. You take them through a series of steps to get closer and closer to you, by getting them to opt into something like a freebie.

You will be in multiple people’s funnels at the same time, where you’ve entered your name and your email, in exchange for usually a downloadable item. It could be a webinar or a PDF cheat sheet.

Then on the thank you page, you would up-sell a small product. It could be a one-on-one session with you. This funnel enables you to continue to market to people and to nurture them.

It means that you’ll get unusually consistent lead flow. So, what you want to do is start with one funnel, provide great value and get people coming closer and closer to becoming a paid client.

I’ve got 20 funnels at the moment. There are different funnels out there for different things like webinars

Building these lead generation strategies, you’ve got multiple streams of ways that people can find you and multiple streams of income and cash flow. You are then building a passive or semi-passive income, that is truly an asset.

Tony Robbins has a million people going through this funnel, every single month. Creating funnels are very doable and anyone can do it once they know how.

If I get an idea for something, I can set up a funnel in about an hour. I have full control of my business that means I can go to any country in the world and still receive income.

And you can too.

Want help creating your own funnel to attract more clients?

‪You can book a free 30-minute strategy session here

*First-time sessions

I’ll help you clarity your next steps to building your own, profit-producing marketing funnel, fast.

Looking forward to helping you get more clients online!

Kat

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Mind Mastery During Chaos

Do you want to feel more in control during this chaotic time?

In the midst of this uncertain season, there is no better time to focus on mastering our thoughts…

…so you can walk through this season well and come out flourishing and thriving.

There’s a lot of uncertainty at the moment – around you, and maybe within you.

Mindset mastery, I believe, is one of the most powerful things that will get us through this season.

To start with, I want to make it clear that I’m not a neuroscientist, I’m not a psychologist. I’m a coach. I help people manage their mind. If you are struggling with severe anxiety or depression, please seek professional help.

I invite you to start with compassion, and accepting yourself as you are, right now.

Without denying that the facts are there, the circumstances exist and this is the reality that we’re all dealing with at the moment.

People are really suffering right now. People are scared.

I don’t take that lightly when I have an opportunity to share my words. Our words can create different feelings in people’s bodies. Our words can change the way people feel – including ourselves.

It’s very interesting times, and it’s so powerful to be able to show up and have these kinds of conversations, whatever your platform is.

Whether that’s a chair at home, whether it’s out for a walk, jumping on your phone, whatever it is to be able to have healthy conversations because that’s what we’ve always done for thousands of years to help us solve our problems.

So to start with, is mind mastery about positive thinking?

In short, no. The reason I chose this topic is because mastering your mind ultimately gives you the most power.

When circumstances are out of your control and when you’re fearful, and there’s so much uncertainty around you, my definition of my mastery in this context is..

…being the master of your own mind – knowing that your mind drives your feelings and drives your actions and your results.

I use a simple model that myself and my clients have benefited a lot from.

It’s called the TEAR model:

T – Thoughts

E – Emotions

A – Actions

R – Results

Our thoughts leads to our emotions, our emotions lead to our actions, and our actions lead to our results.

This is grounded in psychology. If you want to change your results, it helps to find out what thinking is causing that those results to happen.

I do self-coaching models on myself regularly using the TEAR model when I want to change the result I’m getting.

To do this, write down the result that you’re currently getting. Then write the actions that are causing that result. Then the emotions are driving those actions, and ultimately what are the thoughts causing that emotion?

The thoughts are usually the ‘sneaky’ one that you don’t always realise are actually driving our feelings, because it’s often happening at an unconscious level.

You can also use it for the result you want. Do the same thing as above, but in the ‘R’ line write the result you want, then the actions that will get you that result, then the emotions that will drive the action, and ultimately – what do you need to think and believe in order to feel that?

Mastering your mind is like watching what your brain is doing.

For many of us, our brain is freaking out at the moment and going into survival mode and getting addicted to the startling facts.

Things are changing so rapidly around us. So being the master of being able to look at what’s happening in your brain, and actually choose what you want to be thinking on purpose is taking control – it’s taking your power back in this time where it can feel like there’s so little control.

In fact, the main thing we can control and will always be able to control are our thoughts.

It’s not about “Oh, I have to think positive” It’s about thinking on purpose. For example, thinking “Okay. What AM I thinking? And what do I WANT to be thinking?’

It’s about being curious from a place of compassion, asking “What is my brain doing right now? What are the thoughts?” and being the observer from an empowered position.

It’s our brain’s job to keep us safe, so feeling any level of uncertainty or fear is very normal. Your brain is doing its job. But you don’t want to stay stuck there.

That’s why it’s so important to have conversations, because sometimes we don’t realise what our brain is actually doing until we start this conversation.

So, whether it’s through a coaching session or through journaling – it’s important to observe your thoughts. 

To rush to try and make the brain be positive, that can sometimes not help.

This time we’re in is an opportunity to go “Right, I’m going to get to know myself better.”

All our belief systems are coming to the surface – and now we can deal with them. Especially if we’re careful not to ‘numb’ our feelings and allow them to be there. Emotions serve as sign posts.

Pretending that everything’s okay when it’s not and pushing down feelings is not helpful either.

You get to show up however you want. It’s your choice. You get to feel how you want you get to think and act how you want. Just because your friends and family are being a certain way, doesn’t mean you have to follow.

So, take that step back and ask yourself “When I look back, what will the ‘future me’ be happy with how I was?”

Will you say “I’m so glad that I used that as curriculum, as a training ground, a way to show myself what I’m made of?”

The fact that you’re here shows me that you care about self-improvement and that you really want to be the best version of yourself during this time.

The word mastery, to me, makes me feel powerful. We can be the master of ourselves.

I don’t want to just ‘manage and survive’. I want to thrive and flourish. I want to fight, in the most positive way, against the panic and terror and all those things that are destructive. It’s ok to feel them, but if we stay stuck in them, they can be damaging.

Mind mastery gives us a very powerful position.

There are so many things we can do. I’m going to offer you 3 actions today…

1. Externalise your thoughts

Get your thoughts out. Reveal them to yourself. That could look like a conversation with a friend – and make sure it’s someone who cares about you, wants you to be the best version of you, and wants you to succeed and thrive.

Externalising your thoughts through conversation is amazing, which a lot of people are doing, but a lot of people are doing it in a complaining way or in a scarcity way.

It’s ok to talk about what you’re feeling, but it also knowing that you don’t want to get stuck in that victim mode.

You can choose to be hero and the guide, rather than the victim or the perpetrator.

If you’re a coach, this is your time to step up, not shrink back.

In this situation in the world at the moment, so many people are having challenges.

People are at home alone or with their families and their thoughts. Many people are freaking out and need coaching.

People need our minds. Businesses need our minds.

We need production. We need value creation.

We want to be able to coach people from a place of abundance. We want to be able to coach them from a place of not freaking out, but from a place of no matter what, everything’s going to be fine.

If you need coaching reach out. More than ever, we need help from others.

Journaling is also a good way to externalise and process what you’re thinking about – get it out of your head, because when it’s swirling around in your head, it can be very destructive.

There are lots of great offers and things that people are offering to help you, things that help you feel empowered. Listen to your body’s reaction to what you’re consuming.


2. Decide how you want to feel

I recommend you do this on paper. Write down “How do I want to feel” and listen to the feelings, and then write what thought is going to make you feel like that. Ask “What do I need to think about, what do I need to believe in order to feel like that?”

You get to choose. Maybe you want to feel calm, maybe you want to feel energised and active and bring awareness. I believe we all have a part to play in this. It’s so important for me personally to stay calm and happy and keep myself in that state. That’s the best way that I can stay on purpose and help people.

For some of you, you want to feel gratitude and so write down “What do I need to believe in order to feel that?” and simply write it down.

Even if you’re out for a walk in nature and you’re just writing on your phone or whatever you need to do.

You get to choose how you want to feel.

Gratitude is a very neutralising thought. And then you’ve got your really active thoughts, things like “What can I do, how can I help, who can I serve?”

Some of you have got all this excess energy and you don’t want to pour it into anxiety – you want to pour it into your positive actions.

Some great thoughts to think might be “How can I choose gratitude in this moment?” or “How can I be fully present in this moment?” or “How can I just BE right now, without reacting in this moment?”

Anxiety is imagining the worst in the future. I personally like to go to worst case, and it helps me because if I’ve gone there already, my brain doesn’t have to constantly nag at me like “What if this happens? What if that happens?

I’ve already decided that if that happens, I’ll be fine.

I like to think about the fact that I don’t have a right to my next breath. That I don’t have control. I’m grateful for every breath. I don’t have a right to an amazing, comfortable life. Everything that I have is a blessing.

It helps me to go back to our ancestors and think about people who lived thousands of years ago. They were resilient and they survived. We humans are built for this.

It’s good to have a big picture perspective, pulling ourselves back and looking along our timeline, looking at our past and all the things that we’ve got through to remind the brain of the evidence.

I like to look at my past and think about all I’ve been through and how I’ve been fine.

Then go to future. If you are going to think about the future, at least use your amazing imagination to look at what you could create and what you can produce and all the good things that are waiting for you in the future.

We can let our mind wander wherever we want so we might as well let it wander to thoughts that are helpful and make us feel empowered

I like the thought, “Whatever happens, I’ll handle it”.

The reason that I think like this is because I spend a lot of time thinking by myself and working by myself and not consuming a lot.

I consume a lot of great podcasts and audiobooks, and I don’t consume a lot of news. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with consuming news if you choose to and I’ve definitely been consuming a lot more than usual to stay updated.

But when I feel my emotions start to slip, I go back to creating.

We need to get a balance to keep our emotional wellbeing, so remember to create, rather than just consume.

3. Focus on your next step

When we feel in ‘fight or flight mode’ and our brain is shutting down and we just want to curl up and drink and eat or whatever, I recommend that you focus on your next step, so that you’re not overwhelming yourself too far into the future.

It’s so tempting to want to just numb the feelings and consume and use it as an excuse not to take action – not to write that book or do exercise or whatever. And I just encourage you to focus on what’s your next step in getting your goals.

Hold on to your power. You still get make many, many choices.

Even though things have been taken away from us, there’s still infinitely amount of great decisions we can make.

Mastering your mind is about not changing who you are by thinking “I’m just gonna sit on the couch and drink and eat because I’ve got an excuse” but actually taking mastery and deciding what the next step should be.

Ok three powerful questions that you can ask yourself, to prevent those disempowering questions that an ‘unmastered’ mind can throw at us, like “What’s wrong with you?” or “What if I lose my job?” or “What if I get sick”.

You can put contingency plans in place from a place of love, not fear.

1. Who do I want to be?

You might want to close your eyes and take yourself out to the time in the future when this current situation is over. And looking back at now – how did you show up? And are you happy with that?

This is an opportunity for us to get stronger if we want to. It’s not just about putting your whole life and dreams on hold until all of this blows over – no, this is a time to step up.

You don’t grow without resistance. This is a perfect opportunity for you to decide the identity of who you want to be in this time.

2. How do I want to show up?

Decide the actions that mirror how you want to show up.

My sister wants to tuck herself away and finish writing her book.

I want to be coaching more than ever and taking my events online.

We all get the choice.

3. How can I use this to make me stronger?

This is such a powerful question. Your brain will come up with so many beautiful reasons how you can actually use this to make you stronger rather than retreating away from it.

Write it down.

I personally I want to be stronger from this and come out of this better not worse, and I believe that we can. I believe this is a massive opportunity for all of us.

I’d love to hear your thoughts and what resonated and how you’re feeling, so please do reach out.

A huge thanks to Lisa Gumieniuk, who is running the online ‘Chaos To Calm’ summit all week with 15+ experts sharing their best tools to help you feel in control.

Check out Lisa’s Facebook page for details of the summit and the other incredible speakers in the line up this week.

Love Kat

P.S. Are you a business owner struggling mentally or emotionally during this chaotic time?

I’d like to invite you to book a free coaching session with me (valued at $200). This is too hard to do alone!

You can book your free 45-minute strategy session here*

*First-time sessions only. Spaces are limited to 3 people.

Don’t suffer alone. We’re all in this together.

You are amazing, resilient and resourceful.

Be strong and take care, you got this!

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Handling Chaos Well

In the midst of the current world chaos, there is no better time than to talk about strategies for how to handle chaos well.

This week I’m taking a break from the normal business topics, to talk about mindset and how to manage your mind throughout the season that we’re in.

Not everyone knows this but I do a lot of mindset work with people and I’ve been studying the mind for the past two decades and I’m fascinated with the mind, our thoughts, psychology and the brain.

I spend a lot of time researching and contemplating the mind, this is an area that I’m passionate about. The reason I chose business is that I love working with entrepreneurs like yourself, who want to grow their business.

Mindset is key when developing our businesses. Often people bump up against a roadblock, a limiting belief, a negative emotion of fear that holds them back.

It’s not until we work on this area of mindset that we get unstuck, and start flowing and taking action again in our businesses.

So I want to share with you some ways to manage your mind throughout this chaotic time that we’re living through. All of us are feeling the effects of the Coronavirus. A lot of people are feeling fearful, anxious and worried.

If that’s you, I want to give you some ways to think that might be helpful for you, and some mindset tips that you can take away and implement immediately.

These are keys that you can also share with those you influence; your family, your employees, your neighbours and your community.

Understand What You Can Control – The TEAR Model

Firstly, we need to understand the realities of what we can control and what we can’t control.  I teach a model called the TEAR Model to a lot of my coaching clients.

The TEAR Model is a four-step model that shows that circumstances are not the thing that actually drives our feelings, our actions or our results.

T – Thoughts

E – Emotions

A – Actions

R – Results

Circumstances are neutral. The facts about the Coronavirus, the facts about what’s happening are neutral. They are a circumstance. They are the only things we can’t control. We can control the other 4 aspects which is our thoughts, emotions, actions, and results.

If you’re a coach, I recommend it’s so important at the moment to be coaching your clients in managing their thoughts, because we cannot necessarily control the circumstances and the events that are happening. Nor can we control the facts.

We’ve got to be careful with what we view as facts. Make sure that what we are believing is fact and not an assumption of someone around you.

Remember, we cannot control the circumstances, but we can control our thoughts, our emotions, our actions and our results.

It always starts with our thoughts. Our thoughts about a circumstance is going to lead to our emotions. Our emotions that come from those thoughts are going to lead to our actions. Our actions are going to lead to the results we produce.

An example of this is the circumstance with the supermarkets. People’s thoughts are leading them to the emotions of fear, panic, worry and stress. They think they are going to run out of food for their families.

Their thoughts are driving their emotions to overtake common sense and their actions are to panic buy. The result of this is no food or toilet paper left on the shelves.

Another person may walk into the same supermarket but have completely different thoughts, emotions, actions and ultimately results. They may see the empty shelves and think the shops will get restocked, they don’t worry because they know they are cared for.

These people walk in peace and joy, as they know everything will work out for them. You’ve got to separate the facts from the circumstance.

Watch what you put into your soul through your eyes. I call it the eyes gate. And watch what you listen to through your ears (your ears gate).

The media feed us a cocktail of fear. They show what’s happening and the panic and fear grow.  It’s important what you ‘feed’ your eyes and ears at the time. Be protective over them and that of your children (if you have them).

Our social media feeds are called a ‘feed’ for a reason. We’re getting fed constant fear and panic, and that part of our brain is actually getting addicted to it.

The more we are consuming the fear in our feeds, the less that we’re looking at all the beauty in the world. We are overlooking all the love, all the communities rallying together, all the support and all the wonderful things in the world.

3 Don’ts for Managing Chaotic Times

1) Don’t Look to Others to Decide How to Feel

It’s so important that you don’t look to others to decide how you should be feeling.

We need to step up and take leadership, and be great role models.

A lot of people are looking around at people’s eyes and looking at the news and looking at their social feeds to decide how to feel. If someone is panicking, it’s easy to feel like you’ve got to adjust how you feel.

You can almost feel a little bit bad that you’re feeling calm and happy. I feel very calm, and I almost feel tempted to go into guilt for feeling calm and happy!

Use your thoughts to decide how you want to feel.

What feelings do you WANT to feel and what thoughts

Step back and look at this – we are living in a unique moment in history. We are on this journey together as the humans. This is our journey right now and we get to choose how we decide to view it.

How do you want to be known as to how you handled 2020 and what’s going on in the world right now?

We get decide how this time will be remembered in our lives and in the lives of our children.

I choose thoughts that help me stay calm and created and resourceful.

I know that the calmer and happier I am, the more that I can help other people.

It’s important for me to stay calm and to do that, I have to choose the right thoughts.

I have to choose to trust, I have to choose to believe that whatever happens, we will handle it.

2) Don’t Feel Bad for Feeling any Feeling

Please don’t feel bad, guilty or shame for feeling whatever you’re feeling. Whether that’s feeling like you should probably be sad right now, because people are dying, but you don’t feel sad.

If you’re feeling happy and you’re getting on with your life, don’t feel guilt! If you are staying on purpose, and feeling that for you it’s important not getting distracted, that’s the best thing that you can do for the world right now.

Don’t feel bad if you feel scared or if you’ve had to cancel an event. If you’ve got elderly parents and you feel concerned for them. That’s okay.

It’s ok to allow yourself to feel the disappointment, feel concern or feel the hurt. Don’t try to buffer or numb feelings. It’s healthy to sit with your feelings for a while. But you don’t need to stay there.

Be conscious of how others are being impacted by these events and don’t minimise the experience of others. It’s so important though, that we don’t get sucked into depression, anxiety or fear in the midst of this situation.

The leaders that are successful are those that will stay calm. When you’re stressed, you don’t think clearly, you’re not intelligent or smart decisions. As emotion increases, intelligence often decreases.

In this time of uncertainty, it’s good to give your brain certainty.

So stick with routines that keep a level of certainty about your life, like going to the gym or doing workouts and making healthy food. Routines help keep certainty.

3) Don’t Give in to Urges That Don’t Serve You

Resist urges that make you want to drink alcohol, give up your healthy routine or make you want to just stay in bed and not focus on building your business because the world is at a standstill.

Choose things that will benefit you and your business. If it means not looking at the news, then choose not to read or listen to the news. If it’s not helping you, it’s not serving you.

I’m putting my energy into my business into coaching people, focussing around mindset and helping people with their emotions.

3 Do’s for Managing Chaotic Times

1) Focus on Thoughts That Make You Feel Better

Think about what’s going to make you feel better and feel calm. For me, I trust that whatever comes my way I can handle it. I trust that the authorities are doing the best that they can and I trust that I will be provided for.

I know that I have a great community. I know that I can learn from this. I take this as an opportunity to grow.

There’s no point suffering for no reason. There’s no point sitting in anxiety, when you have tools and resources, and people that can help you get out of it.

Sometimes I’ll just stop and sit on my chair and I’ll just write out positive, helpful happy thoughts. It’s not denying the facts. It’s not putting your head in the sand.

You’re looking at the facts and deciding what you want to think and feel about them.

2) Increase Positive Input and Decrease Exposure

How much time, are you spending on your Instagram, Facebook or LinkedIn feed? How much negativity are you allowing into your eye and ear gates?

Double down on your positive input. Listen to positive podcasts, positive addresses on Facebook and spend positive time with your friends. Match the amount of negativity you are seeing and hearing, with the equivalent of positive input.

Coaching is one of the best things you can do at the moment, because coaching helps people let out their concerns. It’s like cleaning your house; you can clean out all the mess inside. Clean up your mind and have a listening ear.

Don’t be scared. You’re not going to run out of work. You have so many people that you can help at this time. Please don’t sit back and wait for people to come to you. Reach out and ask people how you can help.

Offer free coaching sessions and help people with managing their minds. As coaches, we help people manage their minds and focus on what they want.

3) Use This Time to Grow Stronger, Be Creative and Innovate

Put on a growth mindset. People with a growth mindset welcome challenges. They think, ‘How am I going to grow? How am I going to learn?’ They believe the world is going to get better.

We need a filter change. If we filter to see only the bad, we will only see the bad. We need to take precautions and we need to be safe.

We need to choose a positivity filter to view life at this time. Choosing a positive filter means you will see this time as an opportunity to grow. You may have to pivot and run those live events as webinars, but look for the opportunities within this time.

This is an opportunity to get stronger, to look at how you can innovate. Be creative. Join together and form stronger communities. Do your best to be part of the solution.

If you’re a business owner and you’re struggling during this time, I’d love to offer you a free coaching session*

‪If you need help or support for yourself personally or in business, you can book a free 30-minute coaching session here

*First-time sessions

Don’t suffer alone. We’re all in this together.

We the humans are amazing, resilient and resourceful.

We will get through this.

Take strong and take care,

Kat

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